Humanity exists for centuries, I guess, faithlessness exists from the same time. The problem of faithlessness is probably is the most painful of many other problems in marriage.
The highest law of marriage in all times was the faith. And although love – marriage was an ideal, love wasn’t the necessary condition for getting married. Despite of passing centuries, conceptions of “faith and faithlessness” have not lost their actuality. Love for modern family is an important base of marriage, often lack of it is the only motive for its ending. Because of this, faithlessness could lead to destruction of the marriage or serious crisis.

Faith is a commitment to a spouse; it is a fastening knot not only for marriage union, but also for any other too. Faithlessness was always shaming and it was equated to treachery.
Unfaithfulness is a consequence of conflicts and it carries many psychological motives in itself. Marriage life often is broken after faithlessness of one of spouses. It happens because of disappointment in family life. But why it happens? When the initial feeling of love goes to feeling of indifference, the partner becomes annoying, you could even hate him. Unfaithfulness could happen to be in good families and not to be in broken families. Unfaithfulness exists in many families, about ¼ of families. What about reasons of this not so pleasant moment of family life – here they are:

1 – New love

As a rule, this reason is usual for marriages where love didn’t exist at all or was not big enough. These marriages are forced, based on traditions, advantages, fear of loneliness or other motives.

2 – Punishment

A number of unfaithfulness based on a desire to revenge for a spouse’s faithlessness to re-establish self-respect.

3 – Unrequited love

Faithlessness could happen in marriages where one gives love and another takes it without any giving. One of spouses suffers from his unrequited love and this feeling makes him go to take love in another partnership when his love is required. Sometimes the unfaithful spouse doesn’t love a partner he is cheating with, but stays with him expressing the sympathy.

4 – Search of new sexual experiments

This type of faithlessness is common for spouses with a significant family life experience, when feelings are not firing with passion. Also it could be forced by movie’s characters, “beautiful life”, as an imitation to sexual freedom.

5 – Feeling in

In this type of faithlessness a person fills in the lack of love relationship, which arises from long living apart, spouse’s illness, or other limitations.

6 – Total family breaking up

In this case, faithlessness is a creation of a new family, because the old one is not perceived as a family.

7 – Liaison happened accidentally

As a rule, this faithlessness happens to be not often, and could be provoked by circumstances (intoxication, an opportunity, partner’s pushiness etc.)

Faithlessness is not only threatens to the integrity of a family and touches spouses’ feelings, but also is accompanied by deep feeling of jealousy that is destructive itself.
This feeling depends on how many times this happened before. Faithlessness hurts more a trustful and devoted person, because it’s not included in his morals.

Repentance or honest explanation of a cheated spouse is very important for many people. But telling 3rd party about the situation could only make it worse.

Deepness of worry about the faithlessness depends more from how much a person loves his partner and from the size of fear to lose him. Here is a question: “To tell or not to tell him/her about faithlessness” becomes timely. Sure, a person that cheated his spouse wants to get rid of his burden. Sometimes his worries are so strong, that he desires to be punished to get rid of this feeling. He wishes to share this burden with a partner but he doesn’t think about wouldn’t it be beyond his powers.

It’s necessary also to foresee the reaction of your partner. He will be deeply wounded, offended by your confession, will feel betrayed and humbled. No one can forget the faithlessness and never reproach. However, seeing the sincere repentance, a loving person can forgive his partner. Many families, survived after such situation, became closer to each other, because of understanding how much they value this relationship which has not been destroyed once.

The article was taken to you from http://wwwomen.by.ru

 

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